God I do not understand what you are doing!
I can’t even count how many times I’ve said this or thought it in my heart.
So much has changed in the last year and although much of it has been new and exciting, some things don’t make sense at all.
I’ve been believing for some time now that I would find a career that would allow me to work from home. This vision has been on my heart for years. At first it seemed like a distant dream that would never be a reality but in 2014 I had an encounter with God confirming that what I was dreaming about came from Him and one day would be a reality.
Ever since that encounter, the Lord has been leading me on a journey of spiritual growth. I believe He has been developing my character to match the calling He has placed in my heart. To be honest I don’t even know exactly what that calling will look like when it comes together but I know that it will be exceedingly abundantly above all that I could ever ask or think (Ephesians 3:20).
In the last year the Lord has led my family and I to a new church and we are currently building a new home in a new city. The kids are going to a new school which has allowed me to have a less restrictive schedule. I’ve been able to have off more evenings and weekends which has allowed more family time. All of these changes have been new and exciting and I believe are changes that are leading me closer to the fulfillment of my dream.
But with all of these changes will come an increase in living expenses and my husband and I was not sure how we would be able to afford it all. After much consideration and prayer, I believe the Lord told me it was time to change from part-time to full-time.
I didn’t want to believe it at first. How could God ask me to basically turn around and go in the exact opposite direction of my dream. I mean my desire was to work less, not more and I believed that God had placed that dream in my heart, so how could this be?
Just as you cannot understand the path of the wind or the mystery of a tiny baby growing in its mother’s womb, so you cannot understand the activity of God, who does all things.
Ecclesiastes 11:5 NLT
The more I prayed about it the more I realized that it was the right thing to do. I’m not going to lie, at first I was very upset and I was losing all of the excitement of a new home, in a new city because I was beginning to doubt whether I was actually moving closer to my dream.
While I was still struggling with this new revelation and asking God why, I turned on TBN and watched a teaching from Christine Caine. She was teaching from Exodus 14 about the miracle of the parting of the Red Sea.
After the Israelites were delivered from slavery in Egypt, God led them the long way to the Promised Land, taking them through the wilderness toward the Red Sea. When they arrived they had the Red Sea in front of them, mountains on either side, and the Egyptian army behind them. Needless to say they were trapped. God led them to that place on purpose so they could witness the miraculous deliverance of the Lord.
Then the Lord said to Moses, “Tell the Israelites to turn back and encamp near Pi Hahiroth, between Migdol and the sea. They are to encamp by the sea, directly opposite Baal Zephon. Pharaoh will think, ‘The Israelites are wandering around the land in confusion, hemmed in by the desert.’ And I will harden Pharaoh’s heart, and he will pursue them. But I will gain glory for myself through Pharaoh and all his army, and the Egyptians will know that I am the Lord .” So the Israelites did this.
Exodus 14:1-4 NIV
God sometimes leads us to a place where we feel trapped so that when he delivers us, we know it was Him. He brings us to a place where we feel stuck so that when we come out of it, we cannot take credit.
After listening to that teaching, I felt confident knowing that although in my circumstances it looked like I was moving backwards, I could trust that God had a plan that my limited understanding could not comprehend. My responsibility was to be obedient and trust that no matter what direction He is taking me, it is always for good and for His Glory.
Have you ever felt like God has led you to a situation that makes no sense and makes you feel trapped?
What happened as a result?