Have you ever stepped out in obedience to God and it just didn’t turn out the way you expected?
My writing journey has not gone at all how I hoped it would and although I have myself to blame for not writing consistently, a part of me is disappointed in God.
Writing to me was something I enjoyed doing but never considered until I began my journey with God. I learned that the dreams we carry in our hearts were placed there by God and for the first time I believed that it was possible. It felt like He was pushing me to step out and write. So I worked up the courage to create a blog and started writing.
But nothing happened.
Slowly all of the excitement and anticipation were replaced with doubt and discouragement. After not seeing the progress I was hoping to see, I began questioning whether I heard God right. My doubts coupled with a busy life meant my writing became less of a priority. But God has not allowed this dream to die and He keeps pushing me to write.
Over these last 6 years I’ve tried to fight discouragement by convincing myself that likes and follows don’t matter but they do because I’m human. Deep down I have a desire to see my blog grow for validation. I want to know that I belong here. I want to know that my words matter and that my efforts don’t go unnoticed.
But God’s definition of success is so much different than ours. We believe the bigger the platform the better, but what matters to God is the ONE.
The one who has been hurt by people around them and needs to know they are loved.
The one who is suffering and needs encouragement to make it through one more day.
The one who is struggling and needs to know that they have what it takes to move forward.
I believe God is using my disappointment to teach me a lesson in humility. This has nothing to do with me. I am the vessel through which the Lord communicates His message to his child.
That is why I write.
God is big. He is sovereign. He is the creator of the universe. But He is also so very personal and His greatest desire is to have an intimate relationship with each and every one of His children. He loves us. He loves you. He loves me. He sent His son to die in our place so that sin and death could no longer keep us apart.
This blog is not about me. I may be the one who writes, but these words belong to the Lord and they are a personal letter to His child who needs to read it. And I pray that throughout this journey I will not forget that truth.
“The Son of Man has come to give life to anyone who is lost. Think of it this way: If a man owns a hundred sheep and one lamb wanders away and is lost, won’t he leave the ninety-nine grazing on the hillside and go out and thoroughly search for the one lost lamb? And if he finds his lost lamb, he rejoices over it, more than over the ninety-nine who are safe. Now you should understand that it is never the desire of your heavenly Father that a single one of these humble believers should be lost.”Matthew 18:11-14 TPT